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Missings of an Anonymous Rosser

A. Rosser

Issue date: 1/15/08 Section: Features
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After considering a number of opening lines for my first column, I settled on this one: Hello. (Creative, I know.) Now that we have that out of the way, you're probably wondering who I am. To be honest, who I am is not important. What I represent, though, is the important part.

Like you, I am a student at the Ross School of Business, and I see all sorts of strange and interesting things happen each day in the little bubble of a world we live in here at 701 Tappan. And, like many of you, I'm sarcastic, somewhat of a cynic, and find humor in much of what happens here. Come on…be honest: we all talk with our friends behind closed doors regarding the absurdities of networking and recruiting, being a 'gunner', the fact that grades don't matter (but we all still care what we get), Rick's and any number of other Ross-specific topics. So that's what we're going to do here - we're going to tackle the taboo absurdities of Ross and bring them to light just as we talk about them behind closed doors with our friends. Welcome to Musings of an Anonymous Rosser…

Dating
Dating at Ross is an interesting thing. There are 'secret' relationships (which everyone seems to know about anyways), not so secret relationships, and just random undergrad-style hooking up at Rick's (more on that in a future column). Either way, it all sort of has a high school feel to it as stories fly, rumors start, and people dig into any juicy tidbits they can get. So, do you want to stay out of the tabloids? Do you want to survive the b-school dating scene? I offer you the following 4 simple rules:

  • Don't hook up with anyone in the b-school

  • If you want to hook up with someone, refer to Rule #1

  • When you disregard Rule #2-and you will-refer again to Rule #1 and swear to follow it next time

  • After realizing that breaking Rule #1 is almost inevitable unless you're married, engaged, otherwise committed (not always a deterrent), or just asexual, accept the fact that these dating rules mean nothing and try to figure out how to juggle the delicate balance of work, fun and "relationships" that develop between it all. If you find a way to successfully juggle all of these:

    • write it all down

    • copyright it

    • sign a book deal and get it pub-lished

    • make large sums of money, leave school, buy an island and live happily ever after with the person you started hooking up with at Ross.





Questions? Comments? Think you're smart and witty? Try me: anonymous.rosser@gmail.com
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